10 Characteristics of a Good Naija Wife

1) She Never Needs Helps. . . especially from her husband.



2) She Puts her husband first. . . no matter what!


3) She is in tune to her husband's needs



4) She makes excuses for him, no matter how bad he is.


5) She never has time for herself



6) She takes Abuse with a smile on her face. . . behind the bandages


7) She drops everything to see to her husband'a sexual needs


8) She believes wonder working power of prayer



9) She submits mind, body and soul to her husband



10) She accepts she is in it alone



FINALLY TO TRULY ACHIEVED SAINTHOOD AS A NAIJA WIFE, YOU MUST BE WILLING TO DIE FOR YOUR MARRIAGE (PREFERABLY AT THE HANDS OF YOUR HUSBAND)


Peace, quiet and sainthood...what more can any woman ask for?

If you don't have at least seven characteristics listed above then you are not fit to call yourself a Wife and you better repent before it's too late for you.

What Shall it Profit a Naija woman to Gain Everything but not a MRS Title.

Last week a woman came to me lamenting about how overworked she is. Apparently, she is one of the lucky few whose husbands allow to hold a job in addition to her usual wife and mother duties and instead of appreciaitng his magnanimous gesture, this ungrateful wench was going on and on about how he does not help with the dishes, get their kid ready for school or clean the house. She told me how she got mad him for insulting her because she ordered taking out instead of cooking.

Oh my fellow ZW, I would have given her a dirty slap but I didn’t want to cheat on my husband because slapping me is part of our foreplay. I just can’t imagine doing it with someone another guy, not to talk of a woman, soI kept my cool and wrote her off. That is not one person I want to be friends it.

Don’t these women get it? We are married…to Nigerian MEN, that is the ultimate prize any woman can get in her life time. Being a MRS is what we have been preparing for from the moment we were born, why would anyone want to abuse that privilege?

Like I said earlier, I wrote her off completely but not before telling her a few home truth. Below is what I said. . .

The best Nigerian wives are full time wives and mother. . . don't you get it. Quit your job and stay at home to take care of your man, you are even lucky he allows you to orders takeout and only insults you after the fact, some men won't even let it go that far.

A homecooked meal, pampering of your husband, putting his needs first, never questioning him, going to any length to make sure he never suffers a moment of discomfort will ensure you that you continue to have the best 3 letters in the world before your name, the 3 letters that command respect wherever you go. . . I am talking about MRS.


You'd better recognize that fast and recognize it soon because there are many women out there who are now living in regret, biting their fingers and saying "Had I known". If you are interested, I'll send you a book to help you. I've read this book like a thousand times and it has helped me a lot. It's called. . .


101 Ways not MISS out on MRS: What Shall it profit a woman to gain everything but not MRS.

Well that's it. . . even if she doesn't listen, I can go to my grave knowing I did right by her.

Perserverance Endurance and Tolerance,

These three words are what every good Naija Wife must live by.

Yes, the measure of a woman is in her ability to bear prolonged hardship, her determined continuation with suffering and her capacity to wait for the situation to change.

In other parts of the world, this describes A FOOL, A MUGU, AN ODE, A MORON, A BRAINLESS TWIT but we know better, we know that underneath it all, we are being good wives.

I stand proud and I stand tall

Yippie ki-yay!!
Huzzah!!!

I am a Nigerian woman, hear me rooooooaaar!!